Friday, May 21, 2010

Love letter...

On March 22, 2010 you sent me an email on a popular dating website saying that you were interested in my profile and wanted to get to know me better…

…You challenged me to a round of Taboo and literally made me laugh out loud.

Then I looked at your profile and saw that you were not only Buddhist, but a poet with a master’s degree who was looking for a real connection.

We exchanged emails and begin to get to know each other. With each exchange my heart fluttered a little more.

Then on March 29, 2010 you asked me out on our first date…

We went to a cool little restaurant in your neighborhood.

I was so nervous before we met, mostly because I enjoyed the person in the emails sooooo much that I prayed that the woman I was about to meet was just as beautiful and intriguing as the person I had created.

Then I saw you…

You had on plaid sneakers, jeans and a vest…. With your yellow flower earrings on. Your hair was pulled back and your smile radiated across the room when I walked in.

Oh My God, Oh My God is what was going on in my head.

We sat and talked for only an hour, because I had Belly Dance to get to and you had a Poetry Slam.

Right after we left you sent me a text message…

“You are just as beautiful in person and your personality is great. I’ll be in touch”

You made me gush.

I was excited.

Butterflies.

That was on a Monday.

On Wednesday I met you at the park right after work… we sat and talked at Willies and I internally tried to figure out what was happening between us.

Later that night I went out with G to the Wednesday night spot… and after running errands for your ‘boo’ you changed clothes and met me at the club.

My jaw dropped when you walked in. You had on those black peep-toe heels and your besties’ yellow cropped jacket.

I think I squeezed G’s hand when I saw you.

We got drinks and we danced and held hands and rubbed and stroked each other through our daze of intoxication.

You kissed me on the cheek that night when you left.

Two days later on Friday night we both went to the Club.

You wore a dress.

And the plaid heels.

*sigh* Baby you are KILLING me.

It was an interesting night because I wanted to be with you all night, but another girl that I had met on the same dating website (and slept with) was there. You knew about her because I had already disclosed that… but it didn’t make it any less awkward.

All that didn’t matter though.

You bought me a drink, held my hand, stared into my eyes and you kissed me.

Our first kiss was in a club. Not ideal, but you still made my knees buckle.

We left the club and I walked with you to your car so that you could give me a ride to mine.

We talked about our intense connection and what that meant and how we were both so confused and thrown, but so excited at the same time.

Then you kissed me.

We made out in your car for a good 5 minutes and at that point I was ready to marry you.

It felt so different with you. You made my heart skip a beat. You were everything that I had repeatedly said that I wanted. Seriously, ask G.

I said I wanted a beautiful, femme girl- not shy with a great personality that could still hold her own.

And here you are. Exactly that and so much more.

Two days later you invited me to the Easter potluck at your friend’s house. You didn’t want to bring your ‘boo’ you guys weren’t speaking anymore… you wanted to bring me. You said to me, “I have felt more for you in this week than I have felt for her in 8 months.”

I hated that you were seeing her, talking to her, even breathing the same air as her. But we had only been dating for a week and I had convinced myself that if we were meant to be we would.

Easter dinner was the day I realized that I was gonna fall for you. You were such a “Gentle(wo)man”…. so sweet, so attentive, so protective…. You were everything and still this beautiful chocolate feminine woman.

We saw each other almost every other day from that point on.

Then on April 10th…. We went to Martini date, and we wound up back at my apartment.

I’m not going to go into details… but you remember that night. That First night. 

After that I subconsciously dropped everything. I knew I wanted to be with you.

I was even set up with a cute girl, a cute girl who is a Cop, who even seemed to be nice. But I wasn’t interested because I knew I had already found my ‘One’.

Over the next 5 weeks you courted me… like old school discovery process, let’s get to know each other courting. You took me out, I took you out, we spent the night together and we talked for hours upon hours.

There wasn’t a day we didn’t speak.

You were all that I talked about in my therapy sessions. I talked about being scared because I had never felt like this before and how so many people said it was too soon to feel this way, but all I could think about is how happy you made me and how all I wanted to do is be with you.

Skip to Miami.

All girl lesbian weekend on the beach. Girls everywhere. Black ones, Brown ones, whites ones, skinny ones, fat ones….. any girl you could imagine and they were all there for the same purpose… to get drunk, party and get in trouble. And you decided that you wanted to be with me.

It was Saturday, May 15th… we were at the beach- cuddled up in a blanket in the sand overlooking some very happy couple’s sunset beach wedding and you asked me to be your girlfriend.
Me.

<3

I was fine before you got here. Happy even. I was working on myself and truly enjoying the process of self-discovery. I never thought that I would find someone like you this soon. I mean I’ve always known that you were out there, but you have been here the whole time and the stars finally aligned and the universe brought us together. There are no accidents… we crossed paths when we were both ready and I really look forward to seeing what the future holds.

You make me so happy baby…. I have this feeling that we are going to be together for a long time.

Love,
Me

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